LIZ JONES'S DIARY: In which I’m left with nothing

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‘I realise now that every single relationship I’ve had since, ooh, the year 2000 has been based on me giving, other people taking’

What did David say when I asked him why he hadn’t bothered to mention he took his ex, the mother of his child, to Gatwick airport just three days before he came to see me in Yorkshire?

‘Oh, I thought I’d told you.’

Isn’t that the worst answer you could possibly think of? Not, ‘Oh, I was worried you’d be jealous.’ Or, ‘Oh, I didn’t want you to write about it.’ Or, ‘Oh, I’m a natural born fibber.’ Just a vague, dismissive, ‘Oh, I thought I’d told you.’

‘No, you didn’t mention it. So how was she?’

‘I don’t want to talk about it. I’ve got a cold.’

I was annoyed now. ‘I like the fact you can afford a new Jag, and yet you haven’t upgraded the engagement ring that cost you £21.99, and that…

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